Friday, May 6, 2011

Badass: A Relentless Onslaught of the Toughest Warlords, Vikings, Samurai, Pirates, Gunfighters and Military Commanders to Ever Live/ Ben Thompson

Badass:A Relentless Onslaught of the Toughest Warlords, Vikings, Samurai, Pirates, Gunfighters and Military Commanders to Ever Live historical accounts, humor, nonfiction, violence 336 pages

This book had its ups and its downs, and while I wouldn't recommend that someone read all the way through it like I did, it may be a good one to pick up and read a few random chapters or perhaps an excellent bathroom book if you are into graphic violence while you relieve yourself (which I will neither admit or deny is true for me). This book is a listing of 40 of the toughest men (and yes, i'll admit, a few women too) who ever lived. Every single one of these bloodthirsty maniacs, from the well-known such as Alexander the Great, Ghengis Khan, and Bruce Lee, to the lesser known such as famous Gunslinger Bass Reeves or El Cid Campeador is interesting to read about, but their accomplishments all seem to eventually boil down to impressive body counts (whether from gun, grenade, sword, bow and arrow, or massive club depends on the badass in question).

I will admit that hearing the exploits of some of history's greatest badasses had its high points. I was especially interested by Chandragupta Maurya, who commanded an army of drunken war elephants and emploted an elite detachment of highly trained female bodyguards or Vlad the Impaler-- the REAL Count Dracula. I must also applaud Thompson by not limiting the list to brutal, drooling, mercenaries by including Nikola Tesla (the most badass mad scientist to ever live) although Tesla is the only one who is not noticed purely for a body count.

I have to criticize that although most of the information in the book is historically accurate, Thompson hurts his case by throwing in a joke which is obviously fake in order to get a cheap laugh. One such example comes from a description of the hard-partying escapades of Peter the Great of Russia when Thompson writes "Vodka was scattered from holy water sprinklers, topless babes carried drinks around on silver platters, and everybody would have wild parties and hurl in the dumpster behind the local 7-Eleven." Hilarious, right? Yeah, I'll agree, and while I certainly didn't think anyone's stupid enough to believe that there were 7-Elevens in 17th century Russia, I found that humor like this and slight exagerations made one question whether some of the more ridiculous stuff that SEEMED to be true really was. This could get annoying, because there was stuff I certainly wanted to share with my friends, but I wouldn't run the risk of preaching about one of these "landmine lies" and look like an idiot. These historical figures are unbelievable enough. There is no need for excessive storytelling.

Otherwise, though, this book made for an entertaining read. If someone else were to pick it up, I would recommend not reading it in order, because after a while a particular genre of badass, whether pirate, military commando, or samurai, gets old after a while. Enjoy a tale of random badassery every once in a while.

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