In The Days of My Youth I Was Told What It Means to Be a Man

 In The Days of My Youth I Was Told What It Means to Be a Man: A Memoir by Tom Junod, 416 pgs. © 2026

Tom Junod is a fantastic writer from the golden age of magazines. His 1998 article about Mister Rodgers was adapted into a movie with Tom Hanks. In this book, which really reads like 3 different books, Junod dissects his tumultuous relationship with his father Lou--a successful handbag salesman in the 1960s who also led something of a double-life as a rat-pack inspired philanderer. He croons Sinatra, hosts cocktail parties, goes on long trips, etc. As different as the author feels from his father, he can't escape his larger than life shadow. Eventually, Lou dies and the story moves from memory lane into something else--Junod playing detective for the next decade, uncovering his father's clandestine affairs and family secrets. All this leads Junod to discovering in his early 60's that he has a sister he never knew about. The book then pivots again into him developing that relationship. I was apprehensive reading a memoir about someone I didn't really know that much about, but the writing here is top notch. I'm flummoxed at the use of the title, which is a lyric from a Led Zeppelin song, but the band and lyric make no appearance whatsoever. Lou Junod was a Sinatra fanatic, wouldn't a better title have been Strangers in the Night? My Way?  Still, the book is a bit overdeveloped and would've benefited from better editing. But a good read if you're into father/son relationships and digging into the past.