The Secret Diary of Hendrik Groen, 83¼ Years Old

 The Secret Diary of Hendrik Groen, 83¼ Years Old by Hendrik Groen (trans. Hester Velmans), 400 pages.

Hendrik Groen is 83 years old, but that doesn't mean he doesn't think old people are terrible. He decides to keep a secret diary for a year to record the indignities of the nursing home and also to practice saying what he means more often. The novel chronicles not only these things, but also Hendrik's expanding network of friends (the Old-But-Not Dead Club) that try to make his final years something worth living. 

This book is sweet and sad, but I do have to admit that I frequently found it a little dull. The end was devastatingly sad, and not in a way I personally found particularly satisfying. That being said, it was an interesting window into an underrepresented population. 

Wooing the Witch Queen

 Wooing the Witch Queen by Stephanie Burgis, 304 pages.

Queen Saskia is desperately trying to hold onto her kingdom in a political situation where many of her neighbors would rather see her fratricidal uncle on the throne then a "wicked sorceress." She is totally dedicated to developing spells to stop the troublesome and aggressive imperial archduke next door from conquering her kingdom on behalf of her uncle, which leaves little time for either politics are organizing her inherited magical library. Little does she know that the archduke has at no point been in charge of his people, and that he has fled to seek her protection from his former regent, who he is sure wants him dead. Due to some early misunderstandings, Felix assumes the identity of "Fabian" a dark wizard who becomes Saskia's librarian. 

For reasons unknown, something about this cover really drew me to this book, and it was a pleasant surprise! It was overall a very sweet fantasy romance, with less villainy and evil then I would expect from a "wicked sorceress" and a "dark wizard." Both of the characters were mostly very sweet, and it was the kind of slightly ridiculous premise I prefer for my romances. I'd recommend this as a light fantasy romance novel about healing from childhood trauma, although maybe less for people looking for something with a darker edge.  

March Totals

 Annie: 3 books, 883 pages

Byron: 12 books, 3306 pages

Jan: 6 books, 1784 pages

John: 1 book, 328 pages

Kara: 10 books, 3721 pages

Kevin: 1 book, 272 pages

Regan: 11 books, 3234 pages

Totals: 41 books, 12,645 pages

A People's History of the Vampire Uprising

 A People's History of the Vampire Uprising by Raymond A. Villareal, 432 pages.

A young woman dies of a mysterious disease in a small town in Arizona. Later, she walks back out again. This disease "re-creates" people stronger, faster, slower aging, and with a taste for human blood. Soon, with some clever social maneuvering, these vampires (who prefer to be called gloamings) come to make the disease not only accepted but sought-after, even with its high mortality rate. This fictional oral history follows doctors, FBI agents, priests, and many others for a complete look at the gloamings in America.

This is a book with a whole lot of really cool ideas, which unfortunately often go nowhere. Many plot points are picked up and then never resolved, and the whole novel feels like it lacks a through-line to make it work as a book. There are two chapters that imply that nuclear weapons were launched in relation to vampires, but we're never told what actually happened, nor is it ever mentioned again after those two short interludes about 2/3 of the way through the book. This book has some interesting world-building material to chew on, especially for people interested in vampires, but I'm not sure I can recommend it as a cohesive novel. 

The Dungeon Anarchist's Cookbook

 The Dungeon Anarchist's Cookbook by Matt Dinniman, 544 pages.

The third book in the Dungeon Crawler Carl series takes us to the fourth floor, a very different type of dungeon level. This level is more puzzle than adventure game, with hundreds of train lines winding and twisting in an incomprehensible tangle. Luckily the crawlers, the last remnants of what was once humanity, have started unionizing. Huge networks of crawlers are getting connected, and it seems like together they may just survive this yet.

This was a slightly different type of book than the first two, but I think it did a really good job delving deeper into the themes of the series. I also don't think I've ever been more grateful for an author's note, which assured me before the book started that I didn't have to remember the many, many, many train line names and station numbers, thereby freeing me up to actually think about the story. I'm having a lot of fun with this series! I am currently impatiently waiting for book four to come in on hold.